The four children have successfully departed from the mothers and landed in Bangkok. Who knew this city would put Amsterdam and Barcelona to shit in all its guilty pleasures...minus the legalization of marijuana because I have heard that the Thai's have been known to chop some heads off if people are caught doing this herb. The city is a party, I don't know why you would go anywhere else for your bachelor/bachelorette party ever to be perfectly honest...what's the point? Bangkok has it all in the greatest and dirtiest ways possible. I would prefer this to NOT be my last visit to the city.
We wasted no time as we arrived and headed straight for experiencing on of Bangkok's dirtiest pleasures by hopping into a cab and heading to the Red Light District, Patpong. The name is ironically very similar to what is offered through out these alleyways of the city. Alex, Emma, Max and I enjoyed our first experience at a Bangkok "ping pong show." You may at first think this is an actual ping pong show, considering Asians are very good at the sport (no racism here), but in actual fact...we watched a wide array of girls in every weight class, gender (Max made a girlfriend that was a debatable male), and stature perform oddities with their female body part. I won't get into too much detail for the older readers, but I will say that after viewing this spectacle, I will never look at blowing out birthday candles, opening a bottle-cap, hiding a string, shooting darts or smoking a cigarette the same ever again.
If you would like to see urbandictionary definition of what a ping-pong show is...please follow this link because I might of overdone it with the shart definition in a previous blogpost.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ping+pong+show
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| The winner of the Muy Thai fight we went to one night in Bangkok. Successful fight as he knocked his opponent onto a stretcher to end it. Extremely entertaining if you've never been to one. (Please note...I am fully aware that I am quite larger than the fighter) |
Surprisingly, the prostitutes walking around Patpong are surprisingly good-looking compared to what we saw in the ping-pong show. None of the four children took part in the buying of sexual favors of course, but we did see a few men of the 50-60 age group smiling pretty wide at some of the bars along the exterior of the market in that area.
Our first real day in Bangkok was incredible all thanks to a random Thai teacher we met walking along the street right after breakfast. The Thai are extremely happy, smiling people and mostly willing to help you out or rip you off, whichever way they choose to go. This man was extremely gracious as we told him we were from America. He told us where to go, drew pictures on our map, explained the hours of each place, as well as hailed up two tuck-tucks and arranged for them to guide us around all day for a bargain price of 40 baht (a little over $1). We drove around to various sites through out the city and caught all the major tourist attractions; the sitting Buddha, the standing Buddha and the Golden Temple where we could overlook all of Bangkok. We did our meditating through out the day and decided that we were indeed deserving of our first Thai massages. The four of us have not really stopped these treatments from that first day onwards. Its a steep price to pay, having someone stretch out your body or rub you with lotion/oil for an hour for roughly 6 dollars. Who made American masseuses so fucking expensive? Lets learn from the Thai's on this matter quickly...before I get home... shall we America?
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| In our first tuck-tuck of Bangkok. These tuck-tucks are extremely luxurious compared to those of India. As you can see, Max's freakishly long legs have plenty of room to spread out and even cross his right-leg over his left as he reads either 1. the new york times or 2. the guidebook so he can explain everything to Emma and I. :-) | | | |
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| Our first Buddha visit. These are the balloons (not quite sure what they are but we thought they were cool) right outside the Standing Buddha in Bangkok. The Standing Buddha is over 100-feet tall, but now remains hidden inside two buildings, when at one time you could see if from basically every point in Bangkok. | | |
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| Feeding mass amounts of catfish outside the sitting buddha temple-catfish frenzy, as well as the best 20 baht we spent of the day perhaps. |
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| in meditation at the sitting Buddha |
As the drivers continued to drive us around to various sites, we caught all the major tourist attractions; the sitting Buddha, the standing Buddha and the Golden Temple where we could overlook all of Bangkok. We did our meditating through out the day and we decided that we were indeed deserving of our first Thai massages that really haven't stopped since that first day. Its a steep price to pay, having someone stretch out your body or rub you with lotion/oil for an hour for roughly 6 dollars. Who made American masseuses so fucking expensive? Lets learn from the Thai's on this matter quickly...before I get home... shall we America?
We need these massages as we continue to trek on through Bangkok in this swealtering heat. I really have not felt anything like this before (meaning my sweat), which I did know I could produce so much of so quickly. Adding to the sweat spectacle we have enjoyed, the thick, humid, heat-filled air is complimented with the fact that we have to wear long pants (no shorts for boys, no capris for girls etc.) and long sleeves into the temples. Our last day in Bangkok was taken over by a state of delirium from the amount of liquid we produced on our bodies as we strolled through the Emerald Buddha and palace grounds. It didn't help that the local Thai population gets to wear whatever they please and strolls around the premises in skirts, shorts and tank-tops. Because of this very suffering we endure, we have chosen to participate in these massages and treatments quite frequently. Emma and I treated our feet to a spa day when the boys were extremely hungover from the previous night (we made them go dancing at a club). We got the dead skin cleared off by some fish, got a foot massage as well as treated ourselves to a pedicure that ended up causing Emma to have more cuticles then she did before we went into the salon.
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| All sporting our long pants, closed-toed shoes, Emma in a rented shirt, Me in Max's longsleeve (thank God its quick dry), it might of been 100 degrees as we walked around the Emerald Buddha grounds. We obviously were drawing attention to ourselves. | |
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